You Make Me Sick
by Failure Turtle
Summary: Neither of them were religious. ChristianxOC. One shot. Happy Birthday.


**A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY LADY! You got Edge…and Christian…and…Cheese? I don't even think you like cheese. ONE HUNDRED PERCENT FINE CANADIAN BACON! That is so wrong. But THAT is something I know you like.**

"I have a surprise for you."

"Adam, the last time you said you had a surprise for me, you bought new grey trunks that didn't exactly flatter you in the best way."

"Kait, you're my best chick friend. I understand if the nature of our relationship doesn't properly allow you to ogle my goodies in the way that all women should. You'll learn. But I promise that this really _is_ a surprise for you this time," Edge said, covering the eyes of his red haired female friend.

"Good, because you better have dragged me to ECW for a reason this time. Last time you made me come here, I got chased by Mark Henry and Big Daddy V," Kaitlyn laughed, allowing herself to be led around by the Rated R Superstar.

"Just think, this could all be worse. You could be in a wheelchair and I could be running around with you, clicking my heels in the air," Edge smiled. "And there _is_ a reason."

"Adam Joseph Copeland!" Kaitlyn squealed, turning around and slapping the Canadian in the chest. "That was so mean! How dare you do that to your precious Vickiekins!"

"Kait! It was just a storyline! Now no peeking!" Edge said, turning her back around and recovering his eyes. "That's cheating."

"I wasn't aware we were playing a game," Kaitlyn grumbled. She hated not being able to see.

"We're playing 'Pin the Tail on the Two-Faced Reekazoid,' of course," Edge laughed.

"Please don't mention that…"

"Why not?"

"You know why…"

Just a few years ago, Kaitlyn was dating Edge's 'brother,' Captain Charisma himself, Christian. One day, she showed up at the arena looking for him when the WWE was in her area, but he was nowhere to be found. She found out that he quit the WWE and left the week before, and never told his own girlfriend. It wasn't until she saw him on TNA that she got the hint. Kaitlyn just assumed he had dumped her. Not even a breakup call. Hell, not even a text message breakup, even though everyone knows you can't do that. Just a clean break, but one of the parties had no idea what was going on.

"Oh, come on, he had to do what was right for him," Edge said, still forcing her to walk forward.

"He could have at least broken up with me properly first!"

"It was years ago. Aren't you over it yet?"

If he didn't have a stronger grip on her this time, Edge would have a large red handprint on his face.

"You don't get over stuff like this, Adam. Hardy still isn't over Amy. Life still blows."

"Yeah, I get it," Edge sighed. "Besides, we're here."

"Where?"

"Here."

"Where's that?"

"Right here!"

"I CAN'T SEE, DUMBASS! YOU'RE COVERING MY EYES!" Kaitlyn yelled, prying the Canadian's hands off of her face.

"Well, I'll be damned…" another voice said from across the hallway. "My eyes must be deceiving me."

Kaitlyn gasped. "No. No. No. That's not him," she said, closing her eyes, refusing to look.

"Well, guess what?" Edge asked. "You're wrong. WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG!"

"You're so insensitive, bro," the other man said, shaking his head.

"CHRISTIAN! YOU ARE NOT GOING TO PREACH SENSITIVITY HERE, OKAY?" Kaitlyn yelled. She wanted so badly to charge down the hallway and beat him up, but her legs wouldn't move. She was too afraid. "You could have at least told _him_ why you left without saying anything to me!" she screamed, pointing backwards as Edge.

"Maybe I just didn't care," Christian shrugged, pulling his cell phone out of his black denim jacket. "And you know that Christian isn't my real name. You call him Adam, so I think you can call me Jay."

"But Chris—Jay…I…you…"

"Come on, Kaitlyn. Maybe this was a bad idea," Edge said, putting a comforting arm around his friend's shoulders and leading her away from the returning WWE Superstar. "Please tell me that's your cell phone vibrating in there…" Edge joked as Kaitlyn's pocket started shaking.

"Yeah…Hey, I don't know this number," she stated, looking at the incoming text message.

_Just because I left doesn't mean I didn't care. Happy birthday._


End file.
